Recently, a fellow blogger, Mr. What Ho made a nice gesture by asking me to do a guest blogpost on his super-famous humor blog (which I find truly comic), and I had two pieces for him, one is on his blog now and the other is here (it's an old post written a few months ago). I like the idea of doing guest blogging on other blogs (so contact me if you want me to write for you) but it becomes awesome when you're doing it for an upcoming author!
I was at this giant conference a few days ago where I learned the
unique symbiosis between alcohol and research. No kidding. Believe me or not,
it's true. But yes, your mommy might not like this fact.
My purpose at the conference was to acquaint myself with the
current state of the art research and listen to as many presentations as
possible. And like a good and sanskari
kid, I've been staying away from alcohol, parties and similar shit. Turned out,
staying sober may not be the best thing to do in Amreeka.
So there was this nice young professor who was discussing his
research with me, and I like a sincere graduate student was appreciating his
intellect. And that's when he turned all weirdo,
"So Tanya,
what are you doing this evening?"
"Uhmm? (Insert awkward expressions and
inarticulate sounds a socially inadequate being could produce)"
"Well,
there's a party organized by __ organization. There's gonna be free food, and
free drinks too. Would you like to join? WYQ Conference is all about drinks."
I was then in this quandary to say yes or no. Saying an immediate
yes might have sounded desperate and an immediate no a bit rude. And also, I
didn't have any party dress with me. My European friend had advised me to bring
a piece or two but I am good at ignoring good advice. So I paused and
reflected, but eventually said a yes, calming my conscience with the notion
that my motivation to go to the party was only food, and nothing else.
I accompanied the guy and found the party to be horrible. No free
food at all! Liar, that bloody...Only drinks! How useless are unlimited
margaritas for a person like me! In a small suite, 30 people were packed in
darkness, drinking and smoking like the world's coming to an end. In about 30
seconds, I said goodbye to the professor and ran back to my own room, while on
my way I dodged several lovely ladies dressed in golden gowns as they were
scattered randomly all around the five star hotel the conference was organized
at.
I went to sleep after planning the next day's research sessions I
was going to attend, when after a couple of hours the European friend I was
sharing the room with, entered our room, mouthing expletives. She was heavily
drunk and was staggering on the floor while undoing her high heeled sandals.
She looked quite skimpy tonight and I slightly felt jealous of the life she was
having at this conference: going to several parties every night, drinking
heavily, dancing, rejecting cute guys, being happy overall. And then she
started muttering something, which made me feel a lil bad first, but it
countered the jealousy feeling I had before and I guessed that staying sober
and nerdy wasn't that bad after all.
"I hate
these fucken old men. They keep staring at my goddamn legs. I want people to
like me for what I am, not for my, my..." and then she passed out on the bed.
And I went back to sleep, wondering if I'll be able to attend the
next morning 8 AM paper presentation session. Some big shot from MIT was coming
to present.
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Current Book: "The Portrait of a Lady" by Henry James
Current Music: "Call me maybe" by Carly Rae Jepsen
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