I checked the bus timings and my wrist watch one last time before I grabbed my bag and jacket and made a run for the main door. The exit door of the building was a few meters ahead and I had to reach the bus stop within 60 seconds. Because 60 seconds is the time the bus takes to reach the stop closest to my building from the bigger stop where it is scheduled to arrive at 10:11 PM.

I glanced my watch again as I pushed the heavy steel exit door with my tired hands. The minute hand was slightly past 11 minutes and the second hand was moving effortlessly towards the completion of another goddamn minute. The moment I stepped out of the artificially heated structure and stepped on the bare concrete pavement, a cold wind brushed past my ears, reminding me that I had forgotten to employ my jacket's hood. Straggling with my loose bag and flowing jacket, I managed to wear my hood and cover more distance towards the stop.

I saw the bus coming from the other side. It rode the pavement with a considerable effort and engaged itself against me in a 200 meter parallel sprint towards the final destination - the bus stop. I could hear my own cold escalated breath and the crunching sound of fallen leaves beneath my stamping feet. I realized the beginning of fall.

Not much later, about 30 seconds after, I made it to the stop and climbed the bus. The driver nodded and smiled at me in a manner athletes often do after finishing a race. But it wasn't him that caught me off gaurd. It was something else.

It was this strong stench flooded in the bus that caught me and my nostril hair off gaurd. The stench of alcohol. And noises and shrieks too.

Friday, Alcohol, What else? I thought and moved on.

I moved past many shoulders to find a seat at the back side of the bus, where nobody was daring to go and sit and why so, I don't know why. But I came to know the answer of 'why', soon after. The back side was more or less taken by the people who had troubled the olfactory receptors of the sober commuters. Making my way past drunk, shabby haired, half dressed undergrad girls and boys, I found a seat in the corner but before I could find some rest from the sprint I had a minute ago, I found myself talking to a guy who was having a normal Friday.

Guy: Whoa dude, so you been studying?
Me: Uhm, yeah? (I looked at my bag I had now kept in my lap and nodded)
Guy: Wow. You're studying till 10pm on a Friday and am getting drunk. 
Me: Well, no-not really..
Guy:I will be prolly working for you someday. 

Me: huh?

And then he broke the conversation in the same sudden manner he had started it. I took some time to figure the last line he spoke to me and pretended busy in my own thoughts. Then their was a she-friend of this guy, who was talking pictures of herself and her gang and yelling to everyone, "I am 21 and I can drink, how about you?".

I looked at my bag once again and of all those things that I did on this Friday and all those boring things that I will be doing on this Friday night. Then I thought I am 21 too.

But am I living my age? Are we all living our age? Are we living? At all?

-I like PhD people. They are really doing some awesome work out there. And when you do a PhD, you stop being stuck to your own field. You use all the possible sciences and fields of engineering out there to make your project work. In PhD, you innovate.

You Engineer.

As of now, I strongly feel like never leaving the academia. Finding new things every day at the cost of a difficult life is one thing and listening to a grumbling boss in a high paying job is other. I will prolly choose the former.

- After more and more visits to HyVee and Walmart, I am exploring a lot of new stuff and beginning to realize that maybe-maybe the food isn't that bad out here. Maybe I have just been eating the wrong stuff. There is so much variety for every single thing, from biscuits to cereals that you can go crazy while deciding what to buy. Let's see how it goes, as of now, frozen food FTW.

I was walking down the supermarket and my eyes stopped at the Asian section. I strolled down and suddenly a packet glared back to me a set of words I never expected to find here. They read "Chicken Tikka - Mumbai Masala". I was like, what the...I stopped as my jaw dropped and I found an entire rack reserved for Indian curries and dishes. They were like "Heat n Eat" in 2 mins.

A whole new world erupted before my desperate tongue.

- Now I understand the meaning and importance of a bright, sunny day. A couple of days back when an American guy, pointing towards the sky, said to me, "Look, how good it is today. The sun is up and its so warm!".

I was like, "Huh? You mean you like days with sun in it? That's dumb. That's full of sweat." But what I actually said was, "Uhm okay, but I like days when it rains and when the sun doesn't come up so that it's all windy-windy". The guy gave me a strange look and went away.

As the winter grows near, I realize why appearance of sun is so important here. That overly used sentence in literature and stories, "It was a bright, sunny day" became suddenly so clear to me. Yeah, that's how it works for me. I learn best by experiencing stuff.

-One of my friends went for Skydiving. I was asked too. But I didn't go. I tried to make all sort of excuses that its too costly and that it will take away my whole day and also its too risky and all that kind of lame excuses. FYI skydiving in short is paying 200$ for 30 seconds of thrill in which thrill is defined by flying down to earth from a height of 10k feet. But when I asked myself, why I didn't or won't go for this thing, I got the answer.

The answer that I am too afraid. Yes, I am afraid. And that fear is part of because of love. When love enters your life, you become conscious and responsible of your own life. You start being careful.

Btw, any of you reading this, should go for this skydiving thing atleast once. And after that you'll get addicted. Statistically speaking probability of an injury is quite less, you can google that.

[Pictures BELOW]

Another weekly post but kinda late. Also, the context in here may be somewhat stale because the photos I am posting down are 1 month old. But the text is fresh and virgin.


Sorry for the abuse of the most famous word "Like" in today's Internet world. That's another story I don't use Facebook. Before I begin the rant, I have 2 lines to share with you, that came to my mind one evening when I was telling my friend that she should not pull her friends to like what she likes, she should rather make new friends in her liking.


You should not like people to like what you like,
You should like people who already like what you like!



I am finding more and more passionate people around me these days. This wasn't the case back home. Here, people are just crazy and devoted towards what THEY like. Not what others like them to like. Like, if they like to like something, they don't like or unlike if their likeness is alike. They just like.


They have passion. Passion, in their likable lives.


You get it? Refer Facebook's Like for deeper understanding of this word. Oh wait, perhaps you already know that. How much hours you spend there?


Anyway, where was I?


If they are passionate about football and like to play football, they will do that for their entire life. They really won't care if they can do math or understand science. Its about football silly. Why need Science?


If they love to ski or pedal in water, that becomes their passion. Below you will find the photos of my small trip to a nearby river on which a lot of people regularly come for spending an evening with their passions.


Point is, the passion. And, the variety too. Its not just about the Engineers and Doctors. Its about something much more than that. Its about passion. About liking. About love.


I might not need to remind you, but you or any sane person knows this very well, that anyone who did well in this world first loved his work and then became something. You got to like, love something. You to pursue something with a mindless and blind faith driven solely by passion. And then you can expect something.


My love is writing. And I am not able to devote as much time as much it is required to liken it to passion. Damn, hate that. So this post is a reminder to myself that I should stay passionate. So, I buckled up and sent in a story for a huge contest. Like it has 3-4k participants, I guess. There is hardly any chance of winning. I will post my story here in 2 months when I hear the results. But winning is not important right now. Participating IS. And that, I AM doing.


Yes, I am.

[Since the large pics screw up my blog template, I am pushing them down. Take a deep breath and scroll down]


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A passionate girl living her life (I watched her for long minutes doing stunts in the water)

A Passionate guy carrying his passion along...

The back of the river and dam.

Add caption

How about you? Do you have a passion in your life? What are you doing about it?

Note: For putting out a post for the sake of maintaining once a week posting rule of mine, I am putting another one of those unpublished drafts lying junk in my drafts folder. It's almost a month old. Reading it again makes me smile.


(Due to a busy Grad life, my blog posts might not be as long as they were in the past. That's another thing that I have time to party and dance whole night.)

So this Village girl takes another step and experiences the Night life of US and immediately falls in love with it. Last night around 10:30 P.M. with a group of 9 ppl (4 guys n 5 gals) I went to the most happening place of the town...

It was a Friday night. The street was full of intoxicating smell of Alcohol and it was littered with young students with loose senses. There were blue and red lights of the pubs and bars scattered all around. Everyone was walking around you in the most sexiest clothes chosen from the most modernistic wardrobes. There were shrieks of laughter in between. Hordes of young boys and girls were disappearing into their respective bars now and then.

I wanted to stay on the street for a while but since many of my group were inclined to drink, we too ushered into a bar. Inside, the atmosphere was same but more concentrated. Concentrated in the odor and density of people. While the rest of the group ordered their drinks, I played two games of pool with two sober people from the group. Oh, I loved pool! It was my first time, and I actually was able to make some shots. Of course nowhere near the people I was playing with.

Once they were all done and high, we planned to a hit another pub which was famous for it's dance floor. We exited and moved on the next one. The crowd was a little more crazy here. There were a few american couples on the dance floor who were doing 'stuff' other than dancing. People were dancing everywhere they could, on tables, couches, poles and occasionally on the floor. I danced my way till 2 AM after which I was exhausted and so were others. Some of our group who still had the extra energy to dance, danced outside the bar in the parking on hindi/punjabi songs sung by themselves ;)

Work hard for 5 days and loose yourself on the Friday night. It's only fair.

Hi!

I guess I have painted a too rosy picture before y'all in my previous posts (not that the picture is in fact rosy but there are some (some?) thorns TOO)

Bringing before you another post where I jot down points over a period of time and publish when I feel they are of considerable length.

-7th September, 11:16 PM. I just returned from taking out the huge trash. Yeah my roommates make me do all the labor work since I am not able to do the artistic work aka "cooking". So they cook and I clean.

Simple.

As I exited the warm atmosphere of my house and descended the wooden stairs, a chilly breeze struck my bare arm - bent down by the weight of the trash. I watched my slow steps as I moved towards the giant trash can at the end of the colony. Before I could reach the garbage tank, my eyes fell upon a feline creature that lingered around. Or rather, the feline creature's yellow crescent eyes fell upon ME. Mortified and frozen for a few seconds, I hurled the trash baggage into the air aiming towards the tank that lay 10 metres away. I am not sure where it landed but my feet did land on the stairs to my apartment, seconds later.

(Prolly it was just a stupid cat looking for potential dinner. Grad life gives you fantasy imagination.)

- 9th September, 3:14 PM. I just ate the MAGGI I brought for lunch today. I had cooked it last night and now microwaved before eating. It tasted like shit. Hard frozen from the inside kinda shit. Not that I have tasted real shit. But this thing would have been close.

- 9th September, 12:11 PM The pain in my neck and back is so much that I am unable to sleep. I have to wake at 6:30 AM tomorrow as well.

- 11th September 2:21 PM Sometimes (always?) you work on saturdays and sundays.

Following is a collection of my observations of the new things and people around me.

--> Crowd is really hot, hot, hot, hot AND hot here. You can call it TASHAN. Like imba, you know? And not just the girls, the guys are hot too ;) I kinda *love* the summers.

--> People in my town have some weird problem of jogging whole day. No matter what's the time. Early morning or late night or mid-afternoon with a scorching sun on top or evening or any time of day, you always find people jogging around. Whether its the campus or the town sidewalks. There are always hot guys and gals jogging. Nice muscles and abs.

--> If you're new and trying out new stuff at food joints. You will often leave the place cursing, "Damn did I really spend 4 dollars n 35 cents on that shitty thing?" Nevertheless it doesn't stop me from repeating the same mistake the next day albeit over another food item.

--> I swipe my ID card to access the door to my office. Technology? Hell yeah.

--> I just got this email on my official university address. "Hello friends, newcomers, and welcome to another eventful year at X

We, the cabinet of the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgendered, Ally, Alliance are pleased to inform you that our semester is starting off next Wednesday with our annual Ice Cream Social.  This year it is sponsored by the LGBT Student Services and will begin at 6 PM on the brick outside of the bla bla.  Our first meeting will involve some ice breaking activities, which will take place in a relaxed setting that the Alliance strives to provide for all interaction.

Life's been too busy around homeworks. Luckily got a little time to share some thoughts today.


In my entire life, I feel that I had this special connection with my teachers. There were some of them which I really didn't like but then there were a few which I really loved. And as for the teachers' side if anyone would go and ask them, their opinions too would be mostly at the extremities. For them either I had been the most careless and dumb student or I had been an exceptional student. Very few will rate me as a 'nice/normal/decent' student.

And in my bachelors degree, there was this thing that used to happen with me every semester. I used to get in the eyes of at least two teachers every semester. Of course one held love and the other held hate for me. And my record of living up to this phenomenon had been pretty consistent. When I came here in US and the semester began, I was again a bit worried and was wondering if this thing will continue.

Somehow, it did. And it didn't.

I "think" I came a quite close getting a bad reputation in front of a teacher but it seems like it never happened. It all just happened in my worried mind. Or it has but the teacher is not showing it. But yes, I "did" come close to another teacher that I think I really love and he in return appreciates my interests too.

He is a retired professor and quite old. He welcomed me in his office like perhaps no other teacher had ever done to me. And those precious minutes spent with him in the past few days strengthened my grip on my dreams. I know I am talking very vague here and not giving you people any specifics of "What, where and why?" But really, I can't. It's the nature of this blog to stay away from facts. Facts are too mundane and boring. I always try to stay away from names and facts and stuff.

It's all about fiction ;)

And yes, where was I? The meetings, the wise advice and some pivotal events in the past few days have really shaped my world the way I wanted it to. Talking with him, I felt overwhelmed at times on seeing his supportive and encouraging nature. I was "so" much reminded of the book "Tuesdays With Morrie" which I finished a week ago. The way I look at teaching, I sometimes feel that it is one of the most noble professions existing out there. But of course it doesn't suit everyone. You need to know a lot and then you need the right method of telling to novices whatever you know. I don't know about the present but yes maybe after 10 or 20 years, when I feel that I *know* enough stuff, I would love to be a teacher.

I would love to inspire, ignite and most importantly *help* students who would be nothing but my own younger selfs seeking direction.

A great teacher, someone to talk to, someone-someone who could understand everything that I have always meant to say, is what I was primary looking for after coming to US. And I guess I have found someone. It's really important to find that teacher in your life. It's not that I have a "guru" of my lifetime. But yes, for this current phase of my life, I have one. Yes, in past I had a series of teachers who played their roles in perfection. But there had been times when I had no one to guide me. Times of darkness, they were.

I see light now. Pure, infinite, illuminating, White Light.

For every Frodo needs a Gandalf
For every Harry needs a Dumbledore

And so, SOMEHOW I have reached US of A. As I type this, I am well settled in my nice apartment at my overly nice city(perhaps next blog post on this topic). Overall the trip was quite fruitless. I mean it had nothing I had expected from it. Nothing at all when compared to my expectations. Of course it had some weird events on the way but no big fruit in the end. Because I was expecting quite paranormal stuff to happen while I was in mid-air. But naah, no aliens came to hijack the plane. The fairies did not appear out of nowhere. The demons and witches did not stop by. And on the top of it all, our plan didn't hit turbulence and we did NOT crash in some unknown island. We did not get lost.

Duh, pretty fruitless.

The boring life continued and nothing extraordinary happened. Nothing much exciting (except at Chicago where my ticket was declared fraud->see below). I have finally reached a new place and have to do studies etc.

But anyway, I do have a few memories to share with you people. I wish I could write down my entire trip here but I can't because I have slightly forgotten it and also you will get bored. So let me just give you a few snippets of the things I observed.

1. The Random Terrorist Check Interview.
   
2. The Germans
   
3. The Chinki Brothers
   
4. Chicago from Above.
   
5. "Your travel agency is fraud sir, your name is not on the flight."
   

 The Random Terrorist Check Interview.
I reached the sleek new terminal T3 at New Delhi in time and my parents made sure that I was loaded with clothes and accessories to the maximum so that the bags in my hand won't exceed the baggage limits (which already were exceeding, anyway). I looked around and people and chix were dressed so casually and lightly but I was dressed like a snowman ready to conquer Alaska. I hauled up my 3 bags worried that if people nearby were staring at my clothing (which they totally were) and somehow cleared up with the long line of the people taking the flight with me. I was getting my boarding passes done (I needed 3 of them), only 2 were made yet and suddenly their computer flashed or something and they stamped my two passes and asked me to follow some police lady. I was supposed to be perhaps handed over the third boarding pass from Chicago to my final destination but it didn't happen and I guess that's what responsible for #5. Anyway, so the lady explained to me,

Police Lady (PL): Follow me for the Random check interview of passengers.
Me: Huh?
PL: Everyday 5 or 6 people out of the thousands who travel daily are specially interviewed for security purposes. The computer assigns that.
Me: Uh? But (Face full of sweat and tension now)
PL: Oh its nothing, its nothing. The officer will ask just a few simple questions, don't worry, it's routine.

 And that assurance of her made me doubt this random interview even MORE. True story.

 So I was led into this special interrogation room where already a black man was getting interviewed. They were grilling him why he was carrying 60kg excess of baggage. And I guess he was not cool about disclosing the bags to these people and was trying to leave the airport. I was seated in front of a very stern looking bald Indian officer who began questioning me very sternly.

 He asked me a few of questions like,
"Where to?"
"Why US"
"What for in the univ?"
He was pretty cold in all these questions perhaps because all this time he was busy making all kinds of scratches on my Visa and passport. He was checking the authenticity of every part of my passport. Then,
"Which univ you studied before?"
"Bla blah blu"
"Oh that's a reputed university!" (His tone became a lil casual)

 Then he handed me over my passport and said smilingly,
"Btw, your hair looks like a porcupine, ;)."

I exited the interrogation room with my passport in one hand and hand bag in other with an idiot like grin. This hairstyle and the comment was just the beginning of a new era.

The Germans
When my flight landed at Frankfurt, Germany I had an excited and great time to see the airport for 3.5 hours. I very much intended to shop there. I had bought a chocolate like thingy at the large shopping complex in Delhi airport and now it was a Swiss chocolate that took my heart here at Germany. Also I wanted to shop just for the sake of saying "Yes I have shopped around a few continents…" So all this while roaming around the airport I found the Germans to be quite amusing. These German ladies were all hot and stuff. Redheads, you know? So they were like RED HOT. I had this imaginary conversation with a young hot german lady (YHGL).

YHGL: Qaustro quastro pero.
Me: Quastro quastro you're hot.
YHGL: Quastro quastro this is your first time in a developed country isn't it?
Me: Quastro quastro yes, indeeeeeeeeed. So there are others like you?
YHGL: Quastro quastro indeeeeeed.
ME: Quastro quastro, great, I look forward to more imbaness.

 I left her alone then and wandered around to look for other Germans. There was this Gothic-druggist-gay type young man and he was quite hot too. He could have played a Dracula in any upcoming paranormal movie. But Germans were a bit loud. Not much, but yeah a bit. When I tried to talk to the airport staff when I was searching for my terminals, one german lady kinda told me stuff so loud that everyone around was staring at us or me. Lol.


The Chinki Brothers
I found these two guys from Nepal who were on same route Delhi-Frankfurt-Chicago and we 3 kinda stayed together most of the time. One was the Elder Chinki, 4 years elder to me and was going for some ultra noob university. His and mine major were coincidentally same but when I heard his univ's name I almost asked him "How did you get your Visa approved?". But he was all like in Nepal they are allowing easily this time. And then this Younger Chinki was 4 years younger to me and was going to some unknown university for his undergrad. Wierdos both of them.

 But of course, not weirder than me. ;p

Sample, of course.

One thing I didn't like about Chinki brothesr was that in middle of our conversation they often started using their native language and I was all left like, "Huh wtf are you saying ppl," and then it came to their minds after a few minutes that they should speak in hindi. Their English sucked badly. When I say badly I mean even worse than mine. Now you can judge yourself.

 But the thing I liked about them was their love for Bollywood. They could praise it endlessly. Even on the plane out of the 30 or so top Hollywood movies, they chose to watch the only one available Bollywood movie (some flop one) on their entertainment centers. And on this flight, they were sitting apart and still they watched exactly the same movie. I was like "LoL, how could you watch it.." And they were like, "Oh it was so funny!" and continued their praise for Bollywood. They also told me how expensive the dollar was for them because their rupee was quite weaker to the Indian rupee. If my ticket was for 50k rupees their's was for 75k :O

It happens rarely but that time I felt proud of being an Indian.


Chicago from Above
While aboard I tried to sleep most of the times or read my book. I partially watched the movie "How to train your dragon" and I found it pretty cool. Some of the scenes were so mesmerizing and analogous to the view outside my window (I had window seat yay :D) Like in the movie the kid was exhilarated driving his dragon so I too clapped in excitement when I saw the thin wings of the plan slicing through the huge clouds. It was like wafting over mountains of cotton or perhaps snow. And when we neared Chicago as our plane began to descend, I was able to see those huge sky scrapers of the city. They looked so majestic. I wanted to write the description of the aerial view of the city then and there only. One line that I formed in my mind was something like this,

"The skyscrapers were pieces of tall, cold steel on the face of flat, warm earth."

Then I nudged my Elder Chinki brother and said, "Hey see the view outside! Wow! the buildings!" He gave the most dispassionate and not-interested brief glance and resumed his preparation for the landing. I was all like perhaps he too being a civil engineer might like the view outside and understand my feelings for the structures. I was all crazy on seeing those huge structures. But this guy clearly wasn't. He had a lot of issues actually.

Like the entire time, he wore his seat belts. LOL. And when the plane landed or took off he used to hold the side handles of his seat and sit up straight. I was like, "C'mon, we won't die so soon."


"Your travel agency is fraud sir, your name is not on the flight."
Till I reached Chicago the trip was quite awesome and I had a nice time making fun of everything and everyone around me. But after seeing me act like a smartass for a long time, the God guy gave my life a little twist. Yeah a LITTLE twist. I had around 3 hours at Chicago airport to catch my last connecting flight out of which more than 1 hour was wasted at the Customs line where I nearly escaped nabbing by a lady and her smelling doggy. The smelling small doggy was moving around the line and sniffing everyone's bags. He passed mine and I got a sigh of relief but the Elder chinki guy's bag made him stop wagging his tail so there were some problems. I don't know what happened later with his cuz at this point, our paths had diverged.

Then I checked in my bags for the next flight and when I reached the counter to Check in MYSELF, here's how the convo between me and a rude bald American guy went:
Guy: Which flight you are on? (Scanning my passport)
Me: The UA@#$ at bla bla to bla bla..
Guy: Nope, you are'not.
Me: Huh? But my e-ticket has #$%@$#@$ $ @#$
Guy: I am looking at the ticket in the computer and you have no such booking sir.
Me: I booked through MAKEMYTRIP guys and how it is possible??
Guy: Your travel agency is fraud sir, your name is not on the flight. Sorry you need to redo the whole thing and go to terminal 1.

He returned my passport and disappeared. At that very moment, all the fun and excitement vanished in thin air. I was like, "Ohkay, now you're getting to me, USA" So it was like, my baggage was already sent to the next flight BUT I wasn't. So I ran here and there and finally found a special counter where people could address their problems. A long queue was there and I somehow got my boarding pass made and entered the flight just 5 mins before they closed gates. I think it was probably because of the event that happened at the Delhi airport.

All sweaty and tired and full of jet lag and thirsty as I finally sat on the domestic plane, I grabbed what they offered me shortly afterward. I opted for some can of Apple and Cranberry juice with an empty glass full of crushed ice. It was refreshing. After a few minutes I noticed it had "Cocktail" written all over it. I thought I had tasted alcohol kinda thingy. So I asked the American sitting next to me,

"This isn't beer right?"

He laughed at me and said that it was just juice.


I was like, "Ohkay, anyway I have taken too much stuff upon myself today. So whatever."

Just an example what I mean by Indian Saints

Example of Namaste. Also, your weekly dose of hot chix-pix.

Sample pic of bread pakoras.

Sacred Maala

So as the day of escape(an illusion?) approaches near, I look forward to my expectations getting fulfilled.

This is totally me. Ofcourse. Stop zooming now.

Before I begin with that list, let me tell you that my mom is kinda driving me nuts by daily asking for some new thing to buy or shop to take with me to the US. And I am kinda lazy, shopping-hating person who can happily move from one place to another with a bunch of undergarments and shorts occasionally. Hell, I don't even pack toothbrush at times when travelling. Cuz even if I do pack, I often forget to do the brushing thing. Hey now, now, we are revealing too much personal information here. Stop, stop.

So yes, as my mommy packs up my entire room in two and a half huge bags (not really as huge as compared to my peers, but huge as per the villager standards), I sit here, trying to remember what all I expect from the land of the opportunities..

1. Full time electricity/power?
Last night there were quite a few nice power cuts in my sad village. One for three hours and other small-small of two hours in the day. It's really nice when you have something important to do on your computer, electricity is not there and you can happily skip off that work and besides its true than when electricity goes off at night, you are not able to clearly see other people or things, but then again, bumping into someone or something, or furniture which has hard/pointed edges/corners in the middle of the night is also yet again another awesome experience which sadly the citizens of developed nations like US can hardly experience and so having power cuts is kinda great but still I wish in US there will be full time electricity.

2. Unlimited Internet?
In my village (remember every time I say village, I am not limited to the actual village I live in, half of the times, village = India) Internet is kinda quite slow. If I have to watch a video on youtube, I have to place a order first (open the link and allow to buffer) and then go have dinner, sleep etc and then come back to find that the video I wanted to see is finally fully loaded! Yay! (not to mention if a power cut happened all in this while, then your loaded video is gone and you back to square one. Congrats) But yes there are some companies which give faster internet and your video can buffer fast-fast, but then the download limit will be there which is kinda not cool, if you want to download a huge amount of data, sooner or later you will exceed that limit and your daddy will have to pay for your bills and perhaps your daddy will then slap your face or kick your ass whatever he spots first and so although I will miss all this very much, I expect US to have unlimited and ultra fast internet.

3. Coffee? 
I kinda have a myth or something that writers need some addictive coffee on their table to continue to write shit. I mean I am able to write shit anyway all the time. But wouldn't it be cool if I write shit AND drink coffee? Then I can always blame the coffee for the shit I wrote.

"Hey coffee sissy, its you making me write such bad stories n shit, screw you!" 


Would be so cool. And in my village, I don't get good real addictive coffee. All here I can get is some packed shit that doesn't even make me feel high. I have heard in US, coffee has a good variety and too much of it can really screw your life OR writing. SO I kinda expect that to happen.

4. Freedom?
Yeah, freedom is what is all about. I am not talking about the freedom to urinate or spit in public, that kinda freedom you can only have in my village. I am talking about other kinda freedom. You know? Freedom to live your life without any weird stares from people around you. Although I have lived in that freedom most of the time of my shitty life but it would be cool if other people like family, friends, dragons, demons, cats, dogs, mosquitoes, houseflies, bacterium stop bothering me by their dangerous glances they make whenever I do something new.



Hmmm, so that's what its all about. More or less. Can't remember more, but yeah there are plenty more. I think I should go brush now. Or perhaps take a bath. Or maybe none of them and fool around on the Internet with a foul breath in my mouth and few bacteria on my body and waste my day, as usual.

Anything you feel like saying, anything, any expectation you (reader) may have when going somewhere (or US or any country or any village for that matter) or anything that is entirely not related to the above post but not limited to dragonflies or zombies, you are welcome to comment. 

I am not in a very cheerful mood as I write this. This is a post out of stress, worry, fear and mostly regret.

I have this rule of mine (its not mine actually, it's a world famous saying kinda thing) that says "Do only 1 thing in your life and then expect success. You try to do a multitude of things and you will fail, miserably. All those great people are known for 1 field..."

Yes its more of a saying rather than a rule but I like to thrust this rule upon everyone I meet and try to tell them that it IS the secret of success. There is nothing simpler than focusing towards your one goal when it comes to mantras of success.

But the bloody irony of this is that I almost always fail to follow my own rule. I don't focus on my love. I do it though, in fact I give it my highest priority and highest amount of hours in a day. But then in the remaining time I am like, "Oh I should do this and that and this and that! And that too! That,  yes I am going to learn and experience of course after I get a time slot free in my schedule."

Because perhaps somewhere inside I am weak. And afraid. Like everyone else who can't focus on one thing and put all the eggs in one basket. Because we all, are afraid to take such a big risk. We can't afford to make this big an investment and are afraid, "What if even I do everything I can and still fail?" "What if it wasn't the thing for me?" "What if it doesn't work out?" "What if I don't have any plan B to switch back if all else fails?' 


"What if?"

And so I will make every day of my life a struggle. Every day I will try to put as much into as much I can find. I continue this for a few days. I kinda do well in some of the stuff. I feel happy. And then, suddenly it hits me. BAM. MY body gives away. My mind is never, ever ready to give it up. But my poor body does. It gives up of the torture I put through it. Of the sleep and rest I steal from it. Of the calmness and relaxation I never give it. I land in the bed, trying to figure out why don't I follow my own rules. . .

And the story repeats itself over and over and over again.

This is not the first time, I have got screwed up. I have got these medical conditions plenty of times in the past. I am a carrier of enough diseases already. And it seems if I go at this pace, I will keep on pouring flaws into my health till the pitcher is full and ready to burst.

But yeah, one another rule that I would like to tell you is, "If you feel you are screwed up inside, go ahead and see a doctor. They are amazing folks you know. Don't be lazy or stuff, just go."

Its another rule of mine which I often break. Two days back I was like, "Ohk I am fine, I am fine". But today I mustered up myself and finally went to my doc. And the meeting was really, really relaxing. Seriously as I said, doctors are amazing folk, they take your worry away.

So after the doctor has done the diagnosis and given the prescription and assured me I will be fine in a few days, he is like:

"What's your age?" asked the wise doc with a curious glare in his eyes.
"Uhm, 21" said I, rather casually.
"Hmmm its nothing to worry about. Though, you know, your body should kinda work till at least next 9 years. Problems should be arising after 30, not before that. But anyway, you will be fine."

I kinda feel a bit weird as I exit his door and kinda relieved that the issue isn't as big I had thought but somehow I feel it is. Because then I remember that old pundit that has told my mom that I will get a lot in my life, riches, success etc etc and some other things which he was true about, but kinda I will be down at 30. Yes, bloody 30. Not that I believe in the astrology shit, but still 30 is way too early to go down on bed.

And then I remember my dad too, who often says to me that he is worried about my health etc and wants me to live for 100 years and live a very healthy life. (Backstory: I hardly, hardly take care of myself and he kinda knows this fact well). And then I tell him proudly, that "Dad, I don't want a good length in this life. Just a good breadth. That's all."

Although right now, I kinda feel different. So I will just shut up, take my pills and lay down on bed as I hope I get enough length in this screwed up life. Not 100 of course, but perhaps average please? lol ;p


SO, what do you think dear reader (if any ;p)? Do you believe in these rules? Does life's breadth matters more to you than the length?

So guys and gals, here I am back with a bang!


I did this post's Part I here and now I am going to do the Part II. Why the part II now? Why not later or earlier? Because:

1. Obviously I was busy with other crappy stuff and Visa Interview etc.
2. I maintained my losing streak in yet another short story contest which reminds me how much I suck at writing and how much I need to improve. Perhaps this post will help me out more than it helps you :P So if you are here for your daily dose of crap, perhaps this is not for you. Yeah, if you wanna be a writer etc, read on!

Disclaimer: Following is a serious attempt to clean the image of my blog which has apparently dropped to a lewd and satiric level. 

So I ended my Part-1 by covering up the quotes in the first half of the book On Writing By Stephen King. Following are the awesome quotes from the second part. These quotes are much more oriented towards "writing".

"You cannot hope to sweep someone else away by the force of your writing until it has been done to you."
(This phenomenon of actually loving your own work has been rather scarce with me. Whatever I write, after a few days, it begins to stink. It doesn't kinda sweeps me, so I guess I have a lot to learn yet).

"You have to read widely, constantly refining (and redefining) your own work as you do so."
(Every time I read a new book, I can feel my overview and knowledge towards writing growing.)

"If you don't have time to read, you don't have the time (or the tools) to write. Simple as that."

"Waiting rooms were made for books - of course!"
(I remember those 10 minute breaks between my lectures at college in which I tried to scoop some pages from a book. And when a teacher went missing for an entire lecture, I used to be like, "Wow. Entire 1 hour? Where's the empty bench in the play ground? Must get my ass there and read the novel.)

"The more you read, the less apt you are to make a fool of yourself with your pen or word processor."
(Frankly speaking, I have read nothing in my life when I see the number of classics that exist out there...must reach for them...someday...)

"And if you do your job, your characters will come to life and start doing stuff on their own. I know that sounds a little creepy if you haven't actually experienced it, but it's terrific fun when it happens. And it will solve a lot of your problems, believe me."
(I had heard this clichéd point almost endlessly from every author/writer giving advice to newbies. Since two years I thought this to be load of crap. How the hell can characters be real? They are bloody fictitious. But a week back, I felt this. I really, really felt this phenomenon. One of my character did stuff on his own. On his own, baby. And since then I believe it. You won't believe it till it happens to YOU, so watch out.)

"You can't please all the readers all of the time; you can't please even some of the readers all of the time, but you really ought to try to please some of the readers some of the time. I think William Shakespeare said that."

"Writing is not life, but I think that sometimes it can be a way back to life."

"The scariest moment is always just before you start. After that, things can only get better."
(Hell yeah.)

"Writing isn't about making money, getting famous, getting dates, getting laid, or making friends. In the end, it's about enriching the lives of those who will read your work, and enriching your own life, as well."

So basically that's about it. Writing down these quotes made me go through the book once again and I ended up reading some beautiful para's. In fact I wont be wrong if I say that every goddamn line in this book is a quotation worth quoting.

I am glad if I helped you in your writing career and sorry if I bored you to the core (which I am sure I did). But it's okay, you chose it. You brought this ordeal upon your poor soul yourself. You clicked the goddamn link.